Is technology use overtaking your kids — and, maybe, yourself? A digital expert offers tip on how to heal from digital overdrive.
If you’re like digital wellness advocate Chris Sciullo, you were part of a generation that remembers life before smartphones and social media — in other words, a completely different world than the one in which we currently find ourselves.
“I’m currently raising four kids in this always-on digital world,” he shared with the Vanderbilt Health Affiliated Network in a recent webinar, “and it’s one of the hardest challenges my wife and I have encountered in our parenting adventure.”
Part of the challenge, Sciullo says, is that our modern technology is designed to be hard to put down. “We pick up our phones an average of 205 times a day,” he said. “The typical smartphone user receives 146 push notifications per day, which is the equivalent of one every 10 minutes. When those habits start to affect our families, our time, our presence, our connection, it’s worth taking a pause to ask: How did we get here?”
The toll of technology
“A healthy digital life is one that does not impede, but enhances, the person’s daily living.”
Some mental health providers liken excessive technology use to addiction although there is no current diagnosis specifically associated with technology.
“There has certainly been an increase in the use of social media among children and adults due to factors such as advances in technology, social acceptance and work/school cultural changes,” said Dr. Bradley Freeman, a psychiatrist with Vanderbilt Child and Adolescent Psychiatry.
“A healthy digital life is one that does not impede, but enhances, the person’s daily living,” Freeman continued. “Parents need to provide guidance to their children regarding their screen time and social networking sites. It is important for individuals to self-check their own use of electronic media and determine if their use is an interference in their lives.”
Unchecked, overuse or misuse of technology — particularly social media — can create anxiety and depressive symptoms in addition to obsessive behaviors. “This can lead to behavioral changes, especially in children and adolescents due to their unique stage of development,” Freeman said.
The HEAL Method
Sciullo, who writes about healthy screen habits on his Substack, The Connected Parent with Chris Sciullo, teaches families hoping to balance their tech use a technique he calls the HEAL Method: Habits, Environments, Alternatives and Limits.
- Habits: Make small tweaks to your daily habits to break the “pickup loop.” Don’t start your day by scrolling through your phone. During the day, keep your phone “out of sight, out of mind,” only checking it on occasion rather than every time you receive a notification. Say no to phones at the table, and “power down your devices before you power down yourself for the evening,” Sciullo advises.
- Environment: “Part of the HEAL method is to make better choices easier by design, and our environment is a huge part of that,” Sciullo said. A trick he employed with his own family was to create a central charging station where everyone places their phones when they’re at home. “It gives you that physical separation where you’re not feeling that distraction like you normally would.”
- Alternatives: As you’re breaking bad habits, Sciullo challenges you to think about the healthy alternatives you could swap in that are additive to your well-being. “For example: movement, spending time with something creatively engaging or connecting person-to-person,” he said. “It could just be a walk around the block or a few minutes of sketching or calling a friend instead of texting a friend.”
- Limits: This is centered around defining technological boundaries. “Turn off your notifications or set them up so you only receive them once or twice a day,” Sciullo said. “Minimize the number of apps on your device and enable screen-time settings. Track your usage and ask yourself: Does that align with my values and what I care about most, for me and for my family?”
Finding help
If your child is struggling, the first step is to talk with your pediatrician, who can assess and make any needed referrals. Monroe Carell Jr. Children’s Hospital at Vanderbilt’s Pediatric Primary Care clinics ensure quality care for your child as close to home as possible, with 10 locations in Middle Tennessee.
